Starting at Jack-in-the-Box on I-70 on the way to the game, midnight snackin' at the downtown White Castle after 4 or 5 cold Budwiesers at Paddy O's, then waking up and treatin myself to McDonalds breakfast and an eye-opening coffee on the way back home. I also know that I'm not the only one, hours later, to be burying my face in my shirt to avoid the unavoidable smell while using an entire role of toilet paper to clean in-between and all over my chaffed butt cheeks. I'm not the only one to stand up, regretfully turn around, and look at what just happened before you go flushing the two tacos, 12 Whitey's, bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit sandwich and hash brown down the toilet. You could compare this experience to two things:
1)The way the Cardinals have started the season.
2)Having to watch the Cardinals start the season.
I don't know what's worse, the 24 hours after your latest fast food binge, or sitting around a TV awaiting the next disastrous inning in which Cardinal pitching gives up a crooked number.
There are positives to this whole thing, kind of like it's a GOOD taste in your mouth when the Whitey's are going down.
Braden Looper pitched well. Russ Springer pitched well. Jason Isringhausen pitched well. Kip Wells even pitched pretty good on Tuesday night. The pitching has really been the going down part, the hitting, however, is the part that hurts when it comes back out. Am I the only one trying hard not to remember the 2004 World Series right now? Are the bats really that non-existent? Does this Cardinal team really lack the punch to score more than one run over a three game series? Are the Royals better than us?
Or are things going to get better? Technically, they have too. Because it can't get much worse. The media is all over the corner outfielders for not being able to make routine plays, the corner outfielders are blaming the lights behind home plate, the lights behind home plate haven't been tweaked at all, and the Met's corner outfielders are looking at the Cardinal's corner outfielders and wondering what all the bitching and moaning is about?
The real question though is whether or not the lights behind the outfield have been tweaked because it sure as hell seems like Cardinal hitters aren't seeing the ball at the plate either. No problem for the Met's sluggers, though.
John Maine? Two hitter?
Tom Glavine? One earned run?
Orlando Hernandez? One earned run?
Wow.
The only difference between the pathetic performance of the Cardinals after a World Series Championship this year and the pathetic performance of the Florida Marlins after their World Series Championship in 1998 (and 2003) is that the Cardinals actually still have their Championship team intact. The Marlins went out and sold every piece and retooled with washed-up vets or unproven rookies...and they looked much better than us doing it.
I'm jumping the gun, I know. It's only three games in and there's 178 to go. But the red flag is up, and if this continues we're going to be calling for LaRussa to finally wash his lucky Championship underwear. As for the rest of the Cardinals, it's time to get their panties out of wad and start playing baseball.
*It was reported today that Chris Carpenter's elbow seems to be doing much better. The inflammation has gone down, and he is expecting to meet with doctors again tomorrow. Dave Duncan and LaRussa each act like there's no point in worrying, but I'll stay skeptical. Here's to hoping Carp is ready to go next Tuesday, but if not then LaRussa mentioned the possibility of calling left hander Randy Kiesler or prospect Blake Hawksworth up from Memphis to fill the role. Other in-club options would be Ryan Franklin, Brad Thompson, or Josh Hancock (as long as he's not facing the Mets,) although LaRussa did seem hesitant about disrupting the bullpen.
Here's one for the books:
Steve Rosenbloom, Chicago Tribune: “The Bears say they will use the shotgun more. What, is Tank’s Uzi empty?”
Also:
Joe Morgan on the Dan Patrick Show when asked whether or not memorabilia should be allowed in the Hall of Fame from players who cheated: "Yes. Because if not then there would hardly be any memorabilia left."
5 comments:
Why in the world is everyone freaking out about the Cardinals? My goodness, it has been three games into the season.
1) They have only played three "real" ballgames together as a team, they are still jelling with the new players.
2) They have a little nerves starting off the season, maybe all this dang hype is getting to them. If I just played three games out of 181 and I was already getting ripped from every angle, i would be playing bad too.
3) The Mets are good. It's not like they just got their butt kicked by the Devil Rays or something. The Mets are a solid ball club, and one of the best in the bigs.
Yes, the birds did look bad, but give them some more time until we start deciding how bad we're going to be.
What does gelling have to do with hitting a baseball? Nothing. A co-worker of mine, that happens to be a Royals fan, wants to bet me that the Royals finish within 10 games of the Cardinals this year. Surely I should take this bet?
Gelling has a lot to do with hitting the baseball. Maybe not literally, but when you think about it. These players are still getting comfortable being around each other, getting used to each other's company and getting back into the swing of things.
If the Royals finish within 10 games of the Birds then I will pay that man $310.61.
I'll let him know...
After a few Belly Bombers from WC, I cash in with a 7 according to the Bristol Stool Chart, which is quite similar to the Card's play, sloppy and exremely inconsistant.
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