Thursday, October 19, 2006

(I'll Give You) TWO MINUTES (to FIRE Bryan Burwell)

If this was Nazi Germany, Bryan Burwell would be disposed of in the worst way possible. If this was Stalin's Russia, Bryan Burwell would no longer have a voice. If this country was in any way communist, Bryan Burwell would no longer be a part of it. If this was ancient England, Bryan Burwell would be in a closed up, unlit cellar somewhere. Because in all those countries at those times, you didn't speak against your leader. You didn't speak out against your president. And you sure as heck didn't question your King.

ENTER AMERICA.

The Land of Freedom. The Land of Free Speech. The Land of Ignorance.

Refer to any Shakespeare play and you'll understand that speaking against your king meant immediate banishment. Not here, not in America. And Bryan Burwell, you slimy ball of opinion, you've done just that. You've walked right up to the big red chair, in the gigantic gold-plated room, and looked our King right in the eye and basically told him "You're not good enough."

You're a sportswriter. He's Albert Pujols. You're trying to make easy money. He's trying to bring salvation to all those starving for a world championship in St. Louis. You're a greedy servant asking for more. He's your King giving you more.

And you just have to keep asking, don't you?

It's not good enough for you that King Albert is the former MVP, and most likely the current MVP. It's not good enough for you that King Albert has finished in the top five in the National League for 2006 in runs, homeruns, runs batted in, total bases, on base percentage, slugging percentage, and batting average. It's not good enough that he's ONLY batting .343 in the postseason, and in the top five in runs, hits, homeruns, total bases, on base percentage, and slugging percentage in the National League.

It's not good enough for you, is it? So instead of singing his praises (like you never have unless you're trying to make up for something stupid you said in an earlier article, as was the case this week) you decided to bash him about his poor attitude in the clubhouse. Don't worry that his Uncle, and seven-year guardian, died last week. Your words were simple: "I saw a dignified Joe Dumars win the NBA Finals MVP award days after his father passed away. I saw an intense and serene Michael Jordan win an NBA title, then turn into an uncontrollably sobbing mess as he realized his murdered father wasn't there to share this moment with him."

Bryan Burwell. Who cares what you've seen? Who cares about how other great athletes handle tragedies? Who cares whether or not you like or don't like Albert Pujols in a somber mood? We don't attack you when you lose a loved one. We don't compare the way you handle a tragedy to the way Woody Paige and Bernie Miklasz handle tragedies.

I know it's your job to write about sports and athletes. But there are some things you leave alone. We're used to seeing you bash Albert Pujols in the media. We're use to seeing you play the race card every chance you get. We're all getting the sense that you're waiting for Albert Pujols to get busted with something illegal so that you can say "I told you so" and grab some facetime on the national media.

Pujols doesn't need your help to become determined. And don't ever, EVER, EVER AGAIN compare Albert Pujols to Barry Bonds.

Save it, Burwell. Get off the King's case, especially when it involves a family tragedy. And please don't apologize to the fans of St. Louis any more, we're sick of it.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have no idea who this Burwell character is, but I don't like him. I'm gonna have to look up this article. Where is it at?

Anonymous said...

I could be wrong, but I get the feeling that Dave has some issues with Bryan Burwell. Alluding to Nazi Germany and Russia in the time of Stalin is borderline on crossing the line. Here's what I don't understand: If Burwell is pulling the race card (and I'm assuming it's against African Americans), then wouldn't he be accepted by Hitler and Co.? Or at least not be "disposed of in the worst way possible"? I don't want to turn this into a political history debate, but surely they would've at least given him a free ticket for an Underground Railroad ride with Harriett Tubman.

Anonymous said...

I just read those articles on stltoday.com, and I cannot believe that the Post has not fired this guy. I can't believe Pujols even sat down and had a conversation with this moron. Go get'em Birds!

Anonymous said...

Abba, redhawk. Your words have overflowing truth. Dave, "Live from Game 3" was great, but can we please get a pitch-by-pitch analysis for tonight's Game 7?

Anonymous said...

i too also read burwells article. what a disgrace. so pujols doesn't like reporters in his face asking him a thousand times why he's only batting over 300 but not hitting home runs. for pete-sakes. give the man a break. if i was in a locker room on that stage, i wouldn't want people in my face either and i gurantee you burwell doesn't want microphones in his face after his articles go to press.